Jared

umm..

Wed, 26 Mar 2008 06:31:46 GMT

wow.

i'm still sad when i think about you.

a broken heart and ashes to fill the wounds just don't cut it..

Sun, 04 Nov 2007 05:32:28 GMT

i stepped outside my square of influence tonight, where the worlds come together. privileged to see the faint line that was drawn in front of me, i pressed beyond. the darkness unrecognizable, secondary to the vast majesty of the many lights shining down on me. i've never seen so many stars, they had my attention throughout my journey. have the masses stopped to notice this glorious evening? a thought swims through my head and just as fast as it came, it left. my world seemed hollow, for the worse or for the better, i don't recon i know.. but i walked on and left my mind open to anyone who might speak. disguised by meandering emotional facades and marked by the light that saves all. patience is such a hard concept to grasp, but i'll wait until the given time i'll be able to share my live with my equal. a thought passes and diminishes before i can dwell on it. life is living and to me, living isn't alive without someone to share a breathe with.

i don't use this much anymore...

Thu, 06 Sep 2007 01:45:08 GMT

it's good to not be depressed.

Sun, 05 Aug 2007 04:23:49 GMT

throat punch

sleep walking via vomit

Fri, 03 Aug 2007 06:34:09 GMT

drown sleep and eat the earth.. the 'good times' blur down to a fraction of time and life is worn to it's wick.

Tue, 03 Jul 2007 01:30:41 GMT

some people will let you down... and by some people, i mean everyone.

get active.

Fri, 29 Jun 2007 07:01:32 GMT

http://icej.convio.net/site/PageServer?pagename=stop_iran_petition_video

Tue, 26 Jun 2007 02:28:18 GMT

anyone up for the beach sometime this week?.. if so call me or leave a comment on here.

but probably just call me :]

Wed, 13 Jun 2007 03:40:52 GMT

everything comes and goes... i'm getting sick of it. happiness shouldnt be temporary or based on a ny one person or thing.. someone help me screw my head on straight :[

Thu, 07 Jun 2007 06:25:57 GMT

favorite:

simply amazing.

R.I.P.

Wed, 30 May 2007 20:30:36 GMT

i woke up and checked on Gregory (my pacman frog) and he wasnt moving, or breathing, or blinking... today sucks. :[

Fri, 25 May 2007 06:07:10 GMT

every time i start to write something, i feel depressed and that everything i write is in vain. does it make a difference if i express my thoughts and failures? im not thinking "i hope someone can sympathize", actually, i'm not really thinking at all about this being a "live" journal and plus, writing down all the junk that i feel isn't/hasn't helped me ever i don't think... but then again, i don't know that either.

the thing is i know exactly what to do, i just cant stop my brain to do it.

i wish something would happen that wouldn't just temporarily keep my spirits high. something more.

Sun, 20 May 2007 05:14:55 GMT

what a wassste...........

yeah

Fri, 18 May 2007 15:53:32 GMT

~~i'm pretty sure i need a change of pace in things around here.~~ i hate routine... and even more than that, i hate consequences.

Sat, 05 May 2007 07:21:49 GMT

life is a lot less enjoyable without someone to share it with.

even when it gets so good.

does anyone want to do anything tonight?..

Sun, 22 Apr 2007 23:02:03 GMT

there is no one hear.. maybe one dude out in the sauna or hot tub. good thing i'm getting paid an hourly rate today. not making near as much as i did yesterday, but hey, yesterday i was sitting at computer on lj, making frequent breaks for food in the diner, snacking on banana chips, or listening to the appleseed cast on my little sister's ipod.

hahahahahahhahaha this rules.

note to anyone this might apply to - it's not this town that is dead, it's just you that dont have the drive to do anything anymore. pick yourselves up out of the trench of routine and call me... sober. ;]

woo hoo, i write to myself..

Wed, 11 Apr 2007 02:58:35 GMT

i started orientation today, have another tomorrow.. it's like i joined some sort of cult, haha, weird. i like it though, their standards are that of mine, but they are really obsessed with their work... it's really awesome because everyone is super nice, but some people are just like TOO nice and it creeps me out a bit. i think if the building was on fire and molten lava was falling from the sky, some of the staff would probably skip out of the building giggling.. it's that kinda weirdness. buttttt, i'm getting paid to work with cheerful people, so that rocks. i realize a lot of what i write lately is about work.. i guess im starting my transformation, soon, i'll be obsessed. haha nah, j/k.

some people really need to help me schedule some events/something we can do, because soon i'll have the resources to do stuff.. if that makes sense.

post script:

+ stoked about new music
+ stoked about learning muy tai and mixed martial arts
- sometimes i wish i didnt care so much.

Mon, 02 Apr 2007 06:52:01 GMT

p.s. i just got an amazing job

so, i'm going to be able to buy a lot more soda.

this is a real question.

Mon, 02 Apr 2007 06:40:12 GMT

does this happen to anyone besides myself?... during the day and like after around 2 am, my brain thinks differently. like my thoughts start to change and i could think about something in a completely new aspect than i did when i was bright and "alert"

....there is a cat outside that is making a disgusting meow.. i hope it's dying...

anyways... to give a better example.. i could feel i'm happy and things are great, during the day. then at night, sometimes, i could feel horrible, like i want to just disappear.. so clearly, i want to start getting to bed a little earlier, but, do you think that it's just that i'm giving myself time to think at night and i over process thoughts that are constantly speeding through my head?.. i think i just answered my own question... but which is the better mindset? analyzing and dwelling on things until you feel horrible and brain dead, or just going on with life and trying to ignore or forget something, possibly making yourself so busy that you dont have time to even think about the things that pry into your head in the late hours of the night?..

i've come to terms with the realization that everything that i dwell on and think about at night, are usually not even in my own control. why think about things that are out of our control?.. but then again, everything could ultimately be in our control. just because everyone makes the joke about throwing away left over food when their are starving people in india,and then grows up and is completely hardened to the fact that that joke is real.. doesnt mean that they cant realize that and actually take a step forward to make a difference in that nation... basically, my point is.. everything is subject to change and everyone is, likewise. so, if i thought about something that i thought was out of my control tonight, it could possibly be completely under control tomorrow morning... (or i could just feel like crap.)

p.s. most of the time when i write what i do, i look back on, or realize during my writing process, that i sound completely crazy in a lot of what i write... especially at night. haha, weird..

ijustfeltlikepostingnonsensewithapicture

Sat, 17 Mar 2007 06:13:08 GMT

time moves fast.. and i intend on catching up.

then i get lazy..

Thu, 08 Mar 2007 15:33:07 GMT

basically... my pet owns your's hardcore.. and yeah, that's a hamster that was actually bigger than him, in his mouth, muahahahaa.

if anyone could help me out and tell me how to get the video online, that'd rule.. (it's over 200mbs and youtube, photobucket, or any other place i've tried hasn't worked yet.)

well..

Fri, 23 Feb 2007 07:10:15 GMT

for those of you that really know me and know what i do with most of my time, i would like to inform you that i quit. life is full of choices and decisions and i would like to be completely secure and confident in all that i do from here on.. i'm very sad at the moment, but i have peace in my heart, and hope, in the direction i'm going. so for all of you that kind of just read my posts now and then and isn't too concerned with my life, this means i'm coming back to bradenton. i'm not just going to sit around and wait for things to happen though, i am going to be active in finding a job and getting started on my new path. i am so grateful to be able to be apart of the ministry i have been apart of for the past 7, almost 8 years, and i look at this as a transition, not a waste or a new start.. so that being said, i'll be around (in bradenton) a lot more. i'm reaching for a drive in the right direction.

hi again.

Mon, 25 Dec 2006 03:52:33 GMT

i dont have too much to write.. family time is always interesting. my family is so weird, it's hilarious. anyways..

Merry Christmas!

the only thing i wanted for Christmas is going to come a bit later, but i already knew that.. i miss you.

Wed, 15 Nov 2006 22:02:33 GMT

FOX 13

Sun, 15 Oct 2006 21:03:24 GMT

http://www.myfoxtampabay.com/myfox/pages/Home/Detail?contentId=891592&version=1&locale=EN-US&layoutCode=VSTY&pageId=1.1.1

LARA ROCKS MY SOCKS!!! LARA MAKSIMA NEHEDERET VE MUSHLEMET!